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A Man Apologized Badly, Then Apologized Better, and Kept a Friendship

Joseph Bonner

Sep 3

1 min read

The story

People lose each other over pride more often than over the original harm. He almost did.

The first apology explained too much. The second named the impact and asked what would help.

What happened next

They walked again on Sundays. Heart rate data would not show it. Longevity might.

A lesson you can use this week

Send the shorter apology. Do the requested change once in public view.

Sources

Research on apology effectiveness summarized by the American Psychological Association; Harriet Lerner’s widely cited work on apology versus defensiveness.

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